Tag: marriage

How to piss your wife off, 101…..

by RoachKiller

Order your daughter a complete twin car seat / stroller set without consulting your wife!

I’m pretty sure if I wasn’t on the road. You would be reading about my death in the local news paper today…..

Why she really wanted to be in on that decision, I’ll never know! But I’ve been researching this for about 2 months now! So I’m pretty sure I chose the right system…..

I was asked…..

by RoachKiller

What is the secret to a long marriage? Well considering the old lady and I have been together well over 30 years! Here are a few of my secrets…..

1 – one of you be on the road 25+ days a month!

2 – choose your battles! ( the biggest thing evar! )

3 – learn how to say your sorry! ( most important! )

4 – have sex as many times per day as any human possibly can! Or until she throws up a white flag and says, “ I’m to sore!”

5 – any chance you get, never forget those little things your spouse likes and get them on occasion! ( unless they are flowers then kick that bitch to the curb and find a real wife! )

6 – the biggest and most important! When they stop selling her favorite green tea drink at Costco on the west coast! Make the effort to find it in another state! Even if that means, I know a guy who knows a guy whose brother is a truck driver….. )

The v8, water and shrimp are for me! The tea is for her…..

Praise sweet baby Jesus! ( I just can’t stop….. 😉