You should….

by RoachKiller

Smell my ass now!

I was gunna ask Sarah Conner in the jeep next to me at the light out of town!i if she wanted a drip of sweat off my nuts!

I Said fuck that, I want ice cream instead!

Hey gramps…..

by RoachKiller

In the silver Escalade! Were you expecting me to be limping to the shipping office? You realize my foot issue died like 3 weeks ago right?

Maybe you should start getting my blog posts from the source! Rather than that import website that redistributes my content about 2 – 3 weeks behind!

Go to www.roach.es to get the current blog posts! So y’all don’t look like such twats…..

It has cool stuff like pictures and videos! You should really check it out! Cus y’all really do look like cunts!

I just figured it out…

by RoachKiller

The reason why I’ve been having such a difficult time at this company over the last 23 years because I’m like the only driver or employee who’s not homosexual.

It didn’t hit me until just a little bit ago when I saw that transsexual, granny and her boyfriend! I’m like one of the only employees here that’s not a homosexual! no wonder I don’t fit it…..

No, I’m not joking. I’ve been pondering this for years. What am I doing different besides being successful at driving a truck then all the other drivers here?

It just hit me. I’m the only who’s not fucking gay! This isn’t a joke. I’m not lying. That’s the only logical conclusion I can come up with!

So I guess if I continue to work here, I had better buy a male ass protector because God knows what these freaks are thinking…..

Now that I think about it, I’ll be sitting in the driver’s lounge and I’m the only one talking about my old lady. I’m the only one talking about my wife. It’s all coming together……

Oh no……

by RoachKiller

Granny almost got ran over! some transsexual White hair was stupid enough to stop right in the path of everybody walking through the hallway at the petro! Just To pretend to scratch her fake tits.

With the 25 people behind her and the 10 people in front of her all had to stop and wait for that special transsexual to stop, scratch under her fake tits. Then finally let us all get by!

I guess not only does he / she have severe gender confusion. It also has the inability to know from right and wrong and when to stop to scratch her fake tits!

Don’t worry, though his boyfriend was sitting on the couch in front of Dunkin’ Donuts videotaping everybody coming in and out! It was some sort of gay stalker issue. I don’t know it’s weird……

You haven’t…..

by RoachKiller

Figured out why I stopped putting on a VPN or proxy on my phone huh?

When you know, the name, address and personal information of the people that are fucking with you. You kinda don’t need to put on a VPN or a proxy.

Because you know anything that does happen they’re gonna take the fall for it…..

Comprende’ ?

Matter fact, a couple of times I even had to help them get the information they needed to “hack me!”

Yea sure…..

by RoachKiller

I believe you when you tell me that 680*** trailer is one of ours…..

Never mind it says jb hunt on the side! God damn it, that’s close enough for government work!

Don’t let Jesus…..

by RoachKiller

See you banging your favorite down low brother tonight! According to the Bible, “ men don’t lay with men and women are allowed to lay with other women but only if I’m there and allowed to watch and take part!”

Don’t tell Jesus but my personal best was 2 beautiful ladies at once! ( honestly I think that’s probably all I can still handle…. )

Oh ladies……

by RoachKiller

Don’t be mad that my wife married a man who isn’t on a registered sex offender list!

Be mad that you did!

Somebody tell me…

by RoachKiller

Why when I gave a bear report. I proceeded to tell the people going the other way about the mouth breather in the green Hyundai with the white hood.

Then I proceed to tell them about the two bears, sitting there at the roundabout. But for some fucking weird reason, I keep calling roundabouts crop circles!

Why am I relating the two? Crop circles and roundabouts?

Yes lady…..

by RoachKiller

I really have a blackout arm tattoo! Until it’s completely finished! I will be wearing this compression arm cover to keep the sun away!

Sun tans really change the color upon application! Considering I have another full coat of black to do…..

As I turn brown quickly!

Thinking about starting a restaurant…

by RoachKiller

First off, we’re gonna call it the trucker tarded bistro, and museum!

The bistro will only serve food that I have made out on the road. So all the fixings will be from places like Quiktrip, Dollar General, Walmart, and other various cheap food outlets.

The museum, with artifacts, pictures and videos of some of the truck wrecks I’ve seen over the years.

So keep your eyes out for it. I figure it’ll be coming 2082 – 2083…

Been what?

by RoachKiller

3 months since I ordered a new set of keys for my enforcer lock from SLC!

Called yesterday to find out what’s up. I got a call back yesterday asking if it was for my trailer lock or my kingpin lock? As if it really matters!

Was told I would get a notification back yesterday telling me of the status. Roflmao, never got a notification back!

Wow, it’s almost as if Janell never left…..