Author: RoachKiller

Here’s another……

by RoachKiller

Qowinky dinky! I set up my old phone with that free cell plan! My old beat to hell work phone right?

Well I have sent and received but 1 text this entire month since setting it up! Lo and behold, it says I have sent and received 10 texts!

I’m checking known and unknown messages, checking the phone log files, everything!

I have found those texts were sent via one of the companies apps! Huh, how strange….. isn’t it!

Coke Zero, orange cream good! Dr.pecker, strawberries and cream good but way too sweet for me…..

Here’s another……

by RoachKiller

Qowinky dinky! I set up my old phone with that free cell plan! My old beat to hell work phone right?

Well I have sent and received but 1 text this entire month since setting it up! Lo and behold, it says I have sent and received 10 texts!

I’m checking known and unknown messages, checking the phone log files, everything!

I have found those texts were sent via one of the companies apps! Huh, how strange….. isn’t it!

Coke Zero, orange cream good! Dr.pecker, strawberries and cream good but way too sweet for me…..

Wow, that’s full circle…..

by RoachKiller

If you ran beef back in the late 90’s early 2000’s you would know what’s missing from the top of that cornered wall!

There use to be what I called, “ the fuck, I gotta go to work board” Hanging up there!

It was actually an airport style info board that would let drivers know when there loads were ready at either of the beef plants in town!

Today, it’s long gone as everything is app powered now! ;(

What makes this full circle is the woman who cashed me out tonight! Her mom use to work at this truck stop back in the day! She too would cash me out!

What a mind fuck that was! Oddly her daughter is just as beautiful as her mom, minus the dwarfism and hump on her back!

What a fucking trip!

Holy shit……

by RoachKiller

I do believe I have run out of euphemisms to project on the troll lifers…,, fuck, now what do I call these incompetent pricks?

Y’all are missing…..

by RoachKiller

Out! I have found a secret town out in the middle of nowhere that harbors all the methheads, lost and abandoned everywhere else!

I am dubbing this, “land of the sleepless!” Where your meth dreams come true! Where I believe I’m the only sober person…..

I think I see your 1st wife here driver! Should I say high for you?

On a good note, the floors are vacuumed but the cars are all torn apart in almost every yard…..

Sorry puta…..

by RoachKiller

But you’re going to need to provide the contract showing I’ve given you permission to reproduce and redistribute my content!

Cus last time I checked, no such contract exists…..

I am so glad…..

by RoachKiller

I didn’t buy that new pocket knife today!

Stopped at the loves to pick up some hot dogs and a soda to head into deliver tonight!

I knew my next load probably wouldn’t be ready so I wanted to prepare! But as I paid and was walking out. I had one of those geezers cut in front of me at the door as I was walking out!

As I was rolling my eyes, I watched this geriatric lady man, missing his lady wig, but could probably use a walker, the hunch in his little body was rather pronounced! He walked real close to the back of my trailer and read the seal! The look of shock on his face as he read what it said. Damn near made his head explode!

Now I was right behind him as I was looking to do a right side walk around! Yet I’m realizing, I could have easily slit this mother fuckers throat and no one would have been the wiser!

I love the fact these dumb mother fuckers are actually hand delivering themselves to me! Luckily my mental state is actually pretty good despite what I drove through today!

Yet lucky for them I’m not a killer…..

Hey hon……

by RoachKiller

Do us all a favor and clack your dentures together a little bit more! That way we all know you were either a hard-core drug user, or your old man really beat the shit out of you……

Either way we’re all gonna know you might not be a person we want to interact with!

Anyone else……

by RoachKiller

Remember back to when the cesspool that is the trucking industry had much smarter personnel?

Honest to God if I have to dumb myself down any farther just to communicate my, head could possibly fucking explode!

Over the years I had to dumb myself down just to try and fit in. I can’t dumb myself down anymore…..

Matter of fact, I think Trump should pass a law that says smart people are no longer required to dumb themselves down to fit in with a crowd! Dumb people are now required to become smarter to fit in with a crowd…..

You too gotta love it though when the mentally impaired think they got one up on you! They’re all happy and smiley! it’s actually rather disturbing!

It’s even better when they broadcast that they’re Christian…z

How sad…..

by RoachKiller

Went to bed in a monster snow storm! Woke up in still a snow storm! Forgot to turn off my cb and awoke to multiple lip flappers talking about how there not moving. Roads are way too snow covered and iced!

Roflmao! I’m looking at the road cameras and there is not a snow covered or iced road from here to the border!

Ya know that old saying, “ misery loves company?” Yea the wankers are misery and they want your company…..

If I’m gunna go and I only got 21,000lbs on! I’ll bet ya, you’re safe to roll too….

But that, misery, is all up to you…..

Always strange…..

by RoachKiller

How I don’t have a Verizon business account yet my cell is constantly pinging it! Rather than pinging the usual celco partners towers! Like it should for a personal account…..

Figure that one out princess!

Oh no not that…..

by RoachKiller

I have been banned off the greasy faced dispatchers TikTok page! Omg, whatever will I do?

I didn’t even follow the mescaline faced woman and yet there she was! Over and over and over! Even after clicking “ not interested! “ Her entire post feed! Roflmao! With her went all the rest of the trucker tarded videos that were bombarding my feed!

Praise sweet baby Jesus the stupid is gone! Fer now!

Most of all the truck accident videos disappeared too! Praise sweet baby Jesus! 99% of all those accident videos those drivers are so proud to post. Could have been avoided if there Tiny little brains would have dropped their giant fucking egos and slowed the fuck down…..

Praise sweet baby Jesus!

FYI, the empty trailer slid in the mud pit while I was in taking a shit!

I was so scared! Of the shit, not the trailer!

Do you think…..

by RoachKiller

Any of those puta’s I saw drive by at the last drop. Were associated at all with any of the countless Shaffer trucks parked down at the truck stops? Do ya?

I mean that shit would just be fucking pure insanity and stupidity on their part…..

Or do you think your old ladies were coming out in hopes I would give them some of my award winning dicking?